Friday, December 5, 2014

12-5-14



Most of you know that I have an auto-immune problem (systemic lupus erythematosis).
One of the main problems (for me at least) with having SLE... is that I don't "look"sick... and so people tend to discount it when I am not feeling well ("but you look ok")... and worse still.... I tend to push myself too hard sometimes because I know there will be a time when I can't get things done; and I try to stay ahead of the curve.
It's a constant "rob Peter to pay Paul" kind of scenario.
You work really hard on days when you feel ok... because you know that there are many days when you can't do at all... but then; if you do "too much".... those days come sooner and last longer.
It's a vicious circle.

The other aspect of it is... when I am down... I am DOWN.
And apparently, I am there right now.

The good news.... is that I am not indispensable. Life goes on without me being an active part of it.
The bad news... for so many artisans, this is the peak season to get things out there in the public eye and sell things. But for me; this year... I don't see that happening; at least on the level I would aspire to.
And so here I am.
Resting.
Home from the chiropractor; and trying to "take it easy."
(and trying to not feel guilty about all the stuff I feel like I should be doing instead).